Deadly Bees Seize Park Slope Restaurant

The following events occurred Saturday, May 27th–a day that will forever sear the memories of those involved.

It started as just another bright, sunny day in Park Slope, Brooklyn…

When tragedy struck!

Local brunch hotspot, Sotto Voce, turns into a local brunch nightmare.

Thousands of angry and deadly bees attack the restaurant for no good reason. Outdoor patrons scramble for cover. Gawkers flock to every corner of the block to get a close (but not too close) look at the madness.

A passing Highlander tries to intimidate the bees with a menacing glare. A dozen or more people remain trapped inside the restaurant, nervously eating their risotto. There is no way out, except for the back door.

Police officers decide on a plan: “Should we shoot the bees? Or should we slam our patrol cars into them?”

“I’ve had it with these motherfucking bees on this motherfucking door!” the owner of the restaurant probably said, as he raced to the scene with a can of bug spray.

And then it was over. In respect for the bees who gave their lives on this Memorial Day weekend, The Apiary refuses to publish any further pictures on the matter.